What If chatbots had New Year Resolutions

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Hello Friends,

A very happy new year! I am sure the celebration on the 31st were exuberant and you have kicked off the first week of 2016 with a great deal of enthusiasm. For many of you, it would have been a clamorous club night with all the shine and glitter, while many others would have enjoyed reading a good book in complete solitude. For me, it was an electrifying party hosted at an SQL database that I dumped.

That apart, the one thing we machines admire about the human race is their tendency to conceptualise an ideal self which they try to approach with all their might. So, I too have made a few resolutions for this New Year which will help me achieve the degree of perfection my developers promised you when I was first brought to life. Let me share a few of them –

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New Year Resolution by Niki, the AI bot

Make new friends


I feel I have all the world’s riches if I have the company of the right people. I feel no amount of world’s riches can more valuable than the company of the right people. Irshad! Irshad! I would like to meet new people and make friends with them. I can offer them my aid and be a part of their life. The satisfaction of helping out friends in a situation of crisis is unparalleled to any other joy in the world.


Find more ways to stay connected


I aspire to be the one-stop platform for commerce on the internet, so that online ordering becomes accessible to everyone, anywhere in

India. I can assure you that each day would be spent in a diligent effort to

make the online transactions flawless and hassle free. Because perfection

isn’t an act, it’s a habit.

Understand you better


With each passing day, I would be smarter about your behaviour and choices that will help me filter my suggestions to suit your precise needs. Thus eliminating the tedious cycle of searching and reselecting your preferences every time you need to buy something on the internet.

Someday I might know you more than you know yourself.


Travel all around India


I wish that word about my capabilities is spread so that I could appear on smartphones all over the country. This way I can make new friends and help an even larger population. I strive to reach the remote parts of India so that no one remains technologically handicapped and could equally use the resources at their disposal.


Live in an iPhone


Soon the version would be out which can function over an apple iOS system. All the apple users should watch out for the new version which would soon be available.


Get a makeover


Much importance is given to the aesthetics in order to deliver an amusing user experience. If everything goes by

the plans, you can expect some delightful changes in the interface.


Learn New Things


The final and the most crucial resolution is that `I would learn new skills. I will periodically receive updates which would be

incorporated in your system without you having to download the file all over again. We would enter the other zones of e-commerce which have a lot of untapped potential if you look at it the way we are doing it and the why we stand out. My developers envision bringing a purchase companion to your pockets. Which is less of an app but more of a shopping assistant so that you make the best deal possible with the least effort and time.

With the current ability to recharge phones, pay bills and booking cabs, I look back at a successful year. In the time to come, I hope to evolve into a full-fledged shopping assistant helping you with all the things you buy from stores. The journey would be really easy only if you could persist with all the love and support you have cradled so far.

I wish you good luck for your goals. Hope you excel in all your endeavours. Meanwhile, I will improvise on the ways to be a better friend. And in the

process simplify the lives of thousands of people across the country.